Before & After

BEFORE - You take my breath away
AFTER - I feel like I'm suffocating.


BEFORE - Twice a night
AFTER - Twice a month.


BEFORE - She says she loves the way I take control of a situation
AFTER - She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac.


BEFORE - Saturday Night Fever
AFTER - Monday Night Football


BEFORE - Don't stop.
AFTER - Don't start.


BEFORE - Is that all you're having?
AFTER - Maybe you should have just a salad, honey.


BEFORE - It's like I'm living in a dream
AFTER - It's like he's living in a dorm


BEFORE - $60/doz.
AFTER - $1.50/stem


BEFORE - Turbocharged
AFTER - Jumpstart.


BEFORE - We agree on everything
AFTER - Doesn't she have a mind of her own?


BEFORE - Victoria's Secret
AFTER - Fruit-of-the-Loom


BEFORE - Charming and Noble
AFTER - Chernobyl


BEFORE - Feathers and handcuffs
AFTER - Ball and chain.


BEFORE - Idol
AFTER - Idle


BEFORE - I love a woman with curves.
AFTER - I never actually said you were fat.


BEFORE - He's completely lost without me.
AFTER - Why won't he ever ask for directions?


BEFORE - Time stood still
AFTER - This relationship is going nowhere


BEFORE - Croissant and cappuccino
AFTER - Bagel and instant.


BEFORE - You look so seductive in black
AFTER - Your clothes are so depressing.


BEFORE - Oysters
AFTER - Fishsticks


BEFORE - I can hardly believe we found each other.
AFTER - I can't believe I ended up with someone like you.


BEFORE - Passion
AFTER - Ration


BEFORE - Once upon a time
AFTER - The end.


It is amazing to realize how we often allow something wonderful
to fade and become a regret.

May you treasure what you started out with

and remember . . . .