Sunday, February 03, 2008

Santa!

Santa: I have swallowed a key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.

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A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily
since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.

*********
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy
potatoes 5 days ago, he hasn't come back yet!
Santa: Why don't u cook something else?

***********
Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one
customer went there. You know why?
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..

***********
Ultimate answer while changing the job.
Interviewer: Why did you change your last job?
Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell
me where.

************
Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover
is crying furiously...
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy,
I will marry again.

************
Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?
Because he was afraid that someone might watch
him from the key hole.

**************

Sardar wanted to make a STD. call to Punjab,
He wanted to save money so what did he do?
Simple, he went to Punjab and made a local call.

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==========
Oye paaji, apni pregnant wife ko itne dard mein
hospital ki jagah pizza hut kyun leja raha hai........
Sardarji: Kyun key pizza hut mein "Delivery Free" hai.

==============================================
A Sardar enters shop shouts, Where is my free gift with this oil?
Shopkeeper: Iske Saath koi gift nahin hai bhai saab **� ?o
Sardar : Oye ispe likha hai CHOLESTROL FREE.

=================================================

American says: " US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai.."
Sardarji says: " India me to.. shaadi Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"


Sardar orders pizza.
Waiter: Sir shud i cut it into 4 pieces or into 8 pieces?
Sardar: 4 hi karde 8 khaye nahi jayenge

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=========================
Santa dials a number. A girl receives the call.
Santa: Who r u?
Girl: Seeta here.
Santa: Maine to Chandigarh phone kiya tha, yeh to Ayodhya mil gaya

=========================================================
Banta: Truck dekhkar tum kaampte kyon ho?
Santa: Ek truck driver meri biwi lekar bhaag gaya tha, har baar lagta
hai jaise usko vapas karne aya hai.
==============================================
Pathan sitting on the top of the mountain and studying.
When a person asked what he was doing?
He replied, Oye! Higher studies yaar.
==============================================
2 sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
1st Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
1st Sardar: Even i did the same thing, now teacher will
think that we both copied.

==============================================
A sardar learning english introduces his family in the party:
Hi! I am sardar,
this is my sardarni,
he is my kid,
& she is my kidney.
==============================================
Sardar 1: I'm very kanjoos (Miser), I went 2 honeymoon
alone & saved 1/2 money.
Sardar 2: You saved nothing I saved all my money, my friend
was going & I sent my wife with him.

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