Husband vs. Wife

Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means, Without Information, Fighting Every time!

Wife: No darling, it means, With Idiot For Ever

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Wife: I wish I was a newspaper, so I'd be in your hands all day.

Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper, so I could have a new one everyday.

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Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping pills.
Wife: When must I give them to him?

Doctor: They are for you

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Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are.

Husband: You should have known it the minute I asked you to marry me.

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Husband: Today is Sunday and I have to enjoy it. So I bought 3 movie tickets.

Wife: Why Three?

Husband: For you and your parents

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Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest?

Husband: A lovely Push...!!!

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Q: What is the most effective way to remember your wife's birthday?

A: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again

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After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you."

The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

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