Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Monkey In The Plane
Once in Brazil a plane crashed, only a monkey who was traveling in the plane was left alive. Fortunately the monkey was intelligent enough to understand our language and reply in actions.
The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with the monkey.
Officer: "When the plane took off what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Tying their belts"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Saying Hello! Good morning!"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Checking the system"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Looking for my people"
Officer: "After 10' minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Having beverages and snacks"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Serving the travelers"
Officer: "What were the Pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Eating & throwing"
Officer: "After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Some were sleeping and some were reading"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Make up"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Nothing"
Officer: "Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "All were sleeping"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the air hostess"
Officer: What were you doing?
Monkey: Handling the steering!!!!!
No more Questions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with the monkey.
Officer: "When the plane took off what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Tying their belts"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Saying Hello! Good morning!"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Checking the system"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Looking for my people"
Officer: "After 10' minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Having beverages and snacks"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Serving the travelers"
Officer: "What were the Pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Eating & throwing"
Officer: "After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "Some were sleeping and some were reading"
Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?"
Monkey: "Make up"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the steering"
Officer: "What were you doing?"
Monkey: "Nothing"
Officer: "Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?"
Monkey: "All were sleeping"
Officer: "What were the pilots doing?"
Monkey: "Handling the air hostess"
Officer: What were you doing?
Monkey: Handling the steering!!!!!
No more Questions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, April 27, 2008
A Bikers Story
A biker is riding by the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion's cage.
Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her,
under the eyes of her screaming parents.
The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.
Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified
parents, who thank him endlessly.
A reporter has seen the whole scene, and addressing the biker, says: 'Sir, this was the most gallant and
brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.' '
Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right. '
'Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a journalist, you know, and tomorrow's papers will have this
on the first page. What motorcycle do you ride?'
''A Harley Davidson.''
The journalist leaves. The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of
his actions, and reads, on the front page:
BIKER GANG MEMBER ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH.
Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her,
under the eyes of her screaming parents.
The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.
Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified
parents, who thank him endlessly.
A reporter has seen the whole scene, and addressing the biker, says: 'Sir, this was the most gallant and
brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.' '
Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right. '
'Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a journalist, you know, and tomorrow's papers will have this
on the first page. What motorcycle do you ride?'
''A Harley Davidson.''
The journalist leaves. The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of
his actions, and reads, on the front page:
BIKER GANG MEMBER ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Get a yogic facelift
Forget Botox, try facial yoga to give your face a makeover.
LEAVE your tongue hanging out and roll your eyes upwards, blow kisses, tilt your head back and try to kiss the ceiling… hold each pose for a minute. This might sound like a one-way ticket to the loony bin, but it actually sets you on the road to firm jaws and plump lips. This is facial yoga.
Sceptics may sneer, but the trend is here to stay, for those who want to get rid of worry lines and wrinkles. It's a natural facelift, says Asha Bachanni, a Mumbai-based expert, who trained in the art in the UK. She says, "We all know that looks are important. Gyms can tone up your body, but what about the face? A face is made up of 57 muscles, which are as responsive to exercise as other muscles. I believe the face is our biography, and we need to make it a bestseller.”
In the four years since she began her practice, she has had clients from age groups 16 to 72 coming to her. The younger ones mostly to get rid of heavy cheeks or double chins, those in their 30s and early 40s for toning and the above-45 group to address the problem of sagging skin, deep nasolabial folds and wrinkles. It works well for sculpting and toning the face as well as for delaying and reversing the effects of ageing.
Facial exercises stimulate blood circulation for an even skin tone, rejuvenate elasticity and natural collagen. They help diminish fine lines as well as brighten and tighten the skin.
Bachanni has advised several celeb clients, including television actors Mouli Ganguli, Swetta Keswani and Tasneem Sheikh. Says Sheikh, who consulted Bachanni after an accident, "My jaw was stiff and the exercises did help to a great extent. However, I'm not practising it at the moment."
Yoga guru Swami Lalji, practising yoga for the last three decades, swears by it for anti-ageing benefits and a glowing complexion.
Laughter plays an important role in facial yoga and can smooth wrinkles as it increases blood circulation and removes polluted carbon dioxide from the lungs. Yoga expert Suneel Singh believes facial yoga can restore the glow on your face and remove spots, wrinkles, acne and pimples.
So, give it a shot… and why not? It's a lot cheaper than Botox as well!
FACE FIXES
FIX NASOLABIAL LINES AND CORNERS OF MOUTH: Place two fingers on either side of your mouth and pull the corners towards the ears. Purse your lips and try to pout. Hold for a count of 10. Do this 10 times.
STRENGTHEN EYE MUSCLES: Place two fingers at the corners of your eyes. Shut your eyes tight. Open. Do 10 times.
AVOID A DOUBLE CHIN: Press the tip of your tongue behind the upper teeth in your mouth. Place a ball below the chin and press upwards. Hold for a count of 3. Release the pressure of the ball. Do 10 times.
GET A CHEEK LIFT: Place two fingers below your chin and pull it to one side. Place the ball on the other side of the cheek. Raise the ball towards the upper ear lifting the cheek muscles. Hold for a count of 10 and smile on the same side of the cheek. Do 10 times.
What's Your Blogging Personality?
Today i was going through this page to see this wonderful article...& i wanted to check what is my Blogging personality...it was all fun seeing the out come...so i would like you folks to spend some time & see what your blogging personality is..
Your Blogging Type is Worldly and Charismatic |
 You are broad minded and have a wide perspective on things. As a result, you tend to make observations that surprise and delight others. Welcoming and social, you are always ready to make a new friend online. In fact, you often tend to be blogging about what your friends are saying or doing! |
Saturday, April 19, 2008
Amazing Magic For those of you using Windows
MAGIC # 1
An Indian discovered that nobody can create a FOLDER
anywhere on the computer which can be named as 'CON'.
This is something pretty cool...and unbelievable.
At Microsoft the whole Team, couldn't answer why this
happened!
TRY IT NOW ,IT WILL NOT CREATE ' CON ' FOLDER
An Indian discovered that nobody can create a FOLDER
anywhere on the computer which can be named as 'CON'.
This is something pretty cool...and unbelievable.
At Microsoft the whole Team, couldn't answer why this
happened!
TRY IT NOW ,IT WILL NOT CREATE ' CON ' FOLDER
MAGIC # 2
For those of you using Windows, do the following:
1.) Open an empty notepad file
2.) Type "Bush hid the facts" (without the quotes)
3.) Save it as whatever you want.
4.) Close it, and re-open it.
is it just a really weird bug? :-??
MAGIC # 3
microsoft crazy facts
This is something pretty cool and neat...and unbelievable... At Microsoft the whole Team, including Bill Gates, couldn't answer why this happened!
It was discovered by a Brazilian. Try it out yourself...
Open Microsoft Word and type
=rand (200, 99)
And then press ENTER
then see the magic...............................
It is Working & it is tested by me & no harm to the PC in any Form!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Settle your stomach after overeating
• Drink a cup of herbal tea. This helps to settle your stomach considerably.
• Add sugar cubes in some peppermint oil and drink it after the heavy meal.
• Place
something warm over your stomach. You can use a heating pad, hot water bottle or a hot compress. Often, stomachs feel better after 20 minutes of the meal.
• Lie down and rest for up to 30 minutes. Give your stomach-muscles time to move some of the food through your body.
• Breathe deeply to relax clenched muscles that may contribute to stomach discomfort.
• Take a brief, relaxing walk. Sometimes, light movement aids digestion.
• Treat stomach aches with overthe-counter antacids or antigas medications.
• Finally, remind yourself of this experience the next time you’re tempted to overeat.
Enjoy a sunburnfree summer
• Apply aloe vera or vinegar on the affected skin; it will stop inflammation and pain.
• Rub mustard oil on the affected skin and allow it to dry, this will take out the heat from the skin.
• Cut fresh cucumber slices and rub them on the affected area.
• Before taking bath, add some baking powder to the bath water, this will help to soothe the burnt skin.
• Take epsom salt or ice compress.
• Grate some potatoes and apply them on the burnt skin. Starch from the potatoes will soothe the burn.
• While going outdoors wear good quality sunglasses and apply good quality sunscreen creams whose SPF is 30 or above.
• Do not use harsh soaps to wash sun burn.
How to cure razor burns
Causes of razor burns
• Excessive use of after-shaves and colognes
• Applying too much pressure while shaving can cause a razor burn owing to friction
• Insufficient skin lubrication is another cause
• Shaving in the direction opposite to hair growth is also a common cause for razor burns.
• Excessive use of aftershaves and colognes can compound the problem of razor burns by causing dryness.
Razor burns home remedies
• Stop shaving
• The best way to deal with razor burns is to stop shaving. Give your skin some rest and simply let your hair grow back for a while.
• Use a soothing aftershave balm if you are already suffering from razor burns.
For burning sensation
Dissolve two uncoated aspirins in a teaspoon of warm water and mix into a paste. Apply this paste on the affected area. Wash it after sometime with lukewarm water. This will take care of the burning sensation.
For razor burns
An effective razor burn mask can be made by mashing a couple of strawberries with a 1 spoon of sour cream. Apply this mixture after shaving and leave it for 10 minutes. Do this twice a week for fresh, razor burn free skin. Witch hazel, mild salicylic acid solutions and Aloe Vera gel are known to provide relief for razor burns.
Consume foods rich in Vitamin C
Although there are no specifications regarding diets to be followed for razor burns, consuming foods rich in Vitamin C should help in restoring the skin quickly.
Other suggestions
• Use warm water to soften your skin and hair prior to shaving, alternatively shave right after a shower.
• Be sure to apply shaving cream, foam or soap in the opposite direction of hair growth, taking care to moisturise your skin as well as hair thoroughly.
• Start by shaving the easier areas first like the jaw line, cheeks and neck.
• Shave in the direction of the hair growth (usually downward)
• Do not stretch your skin taut while shaving.
• Rinse your razor thoroughly after every use and replace blades every week or more often if needed.
• Electric razors that work gently on your skin prevent razor burns. Use shave oil. Applying pre-shave oil as a first layer, prior to shaving creams and gels helps soften the beard and improve the shave quality.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
With mobiles, it’s blogging on the spot
MICRO-BLOGGING: With mobile internet devices people fire off terse missives about what they are doing or thinking at any given moment.
Mobile internet devices and online communities are merging to a new kind of web diary: “micro-blogging”, where people fire off terse missives about what they are doing or thinking at any given moment.
The postings are bare-bones, on-the-go versions of online journals in which people share their lives and dreams — hence the name micro-blogging.
“Blogging has evolved and become more formalized,” said Yahoo design pattern library curator Christian Crumlish, author of social networking book ‘The Tower of Many’.
“A beautiful blog entry is an art form, and it takes time. So, microblogging fits into your life where you take a minute or two to see what’s going on and go back to work.”
Hot website Twitter has attracted a large following since launching slightly more than two years ago as a way to share text message updates with unlimited numbers of friends instantly via mobile telephones.
Startup Utterz, publicly unveiled last year, goes a step further by allowing users to post text, video, photos or audio from mobile telephones to the internet with a simple call.
“What are the four things you can do with a mobile phone? You can talk, you can send text, you can take pictures and send video,” Utterz president Randy Corke said. “We want to use the technology that you have in your pocket,” he said. “We want to make blogging as easy as talking ... Our users can literally take their mobile telephone out and capture the experience, and the emotion of their voice, and interview people.”
Websites where people post blogs or share pictures or videos have become ubiquitous and firms like Twitter and Utterz are positioning themselves as places to merge and manage the images and words. The power of these technologies was unexpectedly unleashed at a recent US tech conference, SXSW, when attendees microblogged searing critiques of an on-stage interview of Mark Zuckerberg, founder of a popular social networking site.
“The woman interviewing Zuckerberg is lame,” Utterz user Leora Zellman wrote beneath a live picture she snapped of the interviewer, Business-Week magazine’s Sarah Lacey, on stage during the event. “Never, ever have I seen such a train wreck of an interview,” wrote Twitter user Jason Pontin. “Poor girl, flirtatiously awful though she was.”
Lacey “Twittered” her own response. “Seriously screw all you guys,” she wrote. “I did my best to ask a range of things.”
The postings are bare-bones, on-the-go versions of online journals in which people share their lives and dreams — hence the name micro-blogging.
“Blogging has evolved and become more formalized,” said Yahoo design pattern library curator Christian Crumlish, author of social networking book ‘The Tower of Many’.
“A beautiful blog entry is an art form, and it takes time. So, microblogging fits into your life where you take a minute or two to see what’s going on and go back to work.”
Hot website Twitter has attracted a large following since launching slightly more than two years ago as a way to share text message updates with unlimited numbers of friends instantly via mobile telephones.
Startup Utterz, publicly unveiled last year, goes a step further by allowing users to post text, video, photos or audio from mobile telephones to the internet with a simple call.
“What are the four things you can do with a mobile phone? You can talk, you can send text, you can take pictures and send video,” Utterz president Randy Corke said. “We want to use the technology that you have in your pocket,” he said. “We want to make blogging as easy as talking ... Our users can literally take their mobile telephone out and capture the experience, and the emotion of their voice, and interview people.”
Websites where people post blogs or share pictures or videos have become ubiquitous and firms like Twitter and Utterz are positioning themselves as places to merge and manage the images and words. The power of these technologies was unexpectedly unleashed at a recent US tech conference, SXSW, when attendees microblogged searing critiques of an on-stage interview of Mark Zuckerberg, founder of a popular social networking site.
“The woman interviewing Zuckerberg is lame,” Utterz user Leora Zellman wrote beneath a live picture she snapped of the interviewer, Business-Week magazine’s Sarah Lacey, on stage during the event. “Never, ever have I seen such a train wreck of an interview,” wrote Twitter user Jason Pontin. “Poor girl, flirtatiously awful though she was.”
Lacey “Twittered” her own response. “Seriously screw all you guys,” she wrote. “I did my best to ask a range of things.”
Monday, April 14, 2008
Price comparison
Over the weekend, I filled up my car's fuel tank, and I thought fuel has
become really expensive after the recent price hike.
But then I compared it with other common liquids and did some quick
calculations, and I felt a little better.
To know why, see the results below - you'll be surprised at how outrageous
some other prices are !
Diesel (regular) in Mumbai : Rs.36.08 per litre
Petrol (speed) in Mumbai : Rs.52 per litre
Coca Cola 330 ml can : Rs.20 = Rs.61 per litre
Dettol antiseptic 100 ml Rs.20 = Rs.200 per litre
Radiator coolant 500 ml Rs.160 = Rs.320 per litre
Pantene conditioner 400 ml Rs.165 = Rs.413 per litre
Medicinal mouthwash like Listerine 100 ml Rs.45 = Rs. 450 per litre
Red Bull 150 ml can : Rs.75 = Rs.500 per litre
Corex cough syrup 100 ml Rs.57 = Rs. 570 per litre
Evian water 500 ml Rs. 330 = Rs. 660 per litre
Rs. 500 for a litre of WATER???!!! And the buyers don't even know the source
(Evian spelled backwards is naive.)
Kores whiteout 15 ml Rs. 15 = Rs. 1000 per litre
Cup of coffee at any decent business hotel 150 ml Rs. 175 = Rs. 1167 per
litre
Old Spice after shave lotion 100 ml Rs. 175 = Rs. 1750 per litre
Pure almond oil 25 ml Rs. 68 = Rs. 2720 per litre
And this is the REAL KICKER...
HP deskjet colour ink cartridge 21 ml Rs.1900 = Rs. 90476 per litre!!!
Now you know why computer printers are so cheap ?
So they have you hooked for the ink !
So, the next time you're at the pump, don't curse our honorable Petroleum
minister - just be glad your car doesn't run on cough syrup, after shave,
coffee, or God forbid, printer ink !
become really expensive after the recent price hike.
But then I compared it with other common liquids and did some quick
calculations, and I felt a little better.
To know why, see the results below - you'll be surprised at how outrageous
some other prices are !
Diesel (regular) in Mumbai : Rs.36.08 per litre
Petrol (speed) in Mumbai : Rs.52 per litre
Coca Cola 330 ml can : Rs.20 = Rs.61 per litre
Dettol antiseptic 100 ml Rs.20 = Rs.200 per litre
Radiator coolant 500 ml Rs.160 = Rs.320 per litre
Pantene conditioner 400 ml Rs.165 = Rs.413 per litre
Medicinal mouthwash like Listerine 100 ml Rs.45 = Rs. 450 per litre
Red Bull 150 ml can : Rs.75 = Rs.500 per litre
Corex cough syrup 100 ml Rs.57 = Rs. 570 per litre
Evian water 500 ml Rs. 330 = Rs. 660 per litre
Rs. 500 for a litre of WATER???!!! And the buyers don't even know the source
(Evian spelled backwards is naive.)
Kores whiteout 15 ml Rs. 15 = Rs. 1000 per litre
Cup of coffee at any decent business hotel 150 ml Rs. 175 = Rs. 1167 per
litre
Old Spice after shave lotion 100 ml Rs. 175 = Rs. 1750 per litre
Pure almond oil 25 ml Rs. 68 = Rs. 2720 per litre
And this is the REAL KICKER...
HP deskjet colour ink cartridge 21 ml Rs.1900 = Rs. 90476 per litre!!!
Now you know why computer printers are so cheap ?
So they have you hooked for the ink !
So, the next time you're at the pump, don't curse our honorable Petroleum
minister - just be glad your car doesn't run on cough syrup, after shave,
coffee, or God forbid, printer ink !
Two For The Road
SEAT-SMART RIDERS: A man and a woman share space on a single-seater two-wheeler on the Krishnagiri-Bangalore highway
Sunday, April 13, 2008
Clever Girls
A Girl is giving directions to her new boyfriend to get to her apartment.
She says: "You come to the front door of the apartment complex where I live and look for apartment 14A, and with your elbow push button 14A. Come inside and you'll find the elevator on the right. With your elbow hit 14. When you get out of the elevator you'll find my apartment on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell and I'll open the door for you"
The boyfriend says: "Dear, that sounds very easy to find, but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?"
"Oh my God!! You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"
She says: "You come to the front door of the apartment complex where I live and look for apartment 14A, and with your elbow push button 14A. Come inside and you'll find the elevator on the right. With your elbow hit 14. When you get out of the elevator you'll find my apartment on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell and I'll open the door for you"
The boyfriend says: "Dear, that sounds very easy to find, but why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow?"
"Oh my God!! You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"
ADVANCED MEDICINES
A Japanese doctor said, "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks."
A German doctor said, "That's nothing, we can take a lung out of one person , put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks."
A British doctor said, "In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half of a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks."
A Texan doctor, not to be outdone said, "You guys are way behind. We took an asshole out of Texas , put him in the White House and now half the country is looking for work."
A German doctor said, "That's nothing, we can take a lung out of one person , put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks."
A British doctor said, "In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half of a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks."
A Texan doctor, not to be outdone said, "You guys are way behind. We took an asshole out of Texas , put him in the White House and now half the country is looking for work."
Sunday, April 06, 2008
Ten commandments for peace of mind
1 . Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked .
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others'
affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our
way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do
not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the
right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of
individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created
each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act
in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because
God within them prompts them that way. There is God to look after
everything. Why are you bothered? Mind your own business and you will
keep Your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget.
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill
feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us.
We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep,
development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or
injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by
constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Believe in the
justice of God and the doctrine of Karma. Let Him judge the act of the
one who insulted you. Life is too short to waste in such trifles.
Forgive, Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and
forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition.
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody
without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in
power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your
achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to
kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is
not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely and
leave the rest to God.
4. Do Not Be Jealous.
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind.
You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but
sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business
several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor
whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like
these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember
everybody's life is shaped by his or her previous Karma, which has now
become his destiny. If you are destined to be rich, nothing in the
world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you
either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune.
Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace
of mind.
5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are
you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As
you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you,
will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious .
6 . Endure What Cannot Be Cured.
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every
day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and
accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or
change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn
to endure them cheerfully thinking, "God wills it so, so be it." God's
plan is beyond our comprehension. Believe in it and you will gain in
terms of patience, inner strength and will power.
7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take
more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is
done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional
loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by
expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements
and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will
reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. Uncluttered
mind will produce greater peace of mind.
8. Meditate Regularly.
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is
the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If
you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend
to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours.
Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would
benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily mediation. You may
think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary,
this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce
better results in less time.
9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the
vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something
worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your
interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind.
Your hobby, like social work or temple work, may not always earn you
more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement.
Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy
reading or mental chanting of God's name.
10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret.
Do not waste time in protracted wondering "Should I or shouldn't I?"
Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental
debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate
all future happenings. Always remember, God has His own plan, too for
you. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does
not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your
mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will
lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the
past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only
that way. Take it as the Will of God. You do not have the power to
alter the course of God's Will. Why cry over spilt milk?
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others'
affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our
way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do
not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the
right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of
individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created
each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act
in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because
God within them prompts them that way. There is God to look after
everything. Why are you bothered? Mind your own business and you will
keep Your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget.
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill
feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us.
We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep,
development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or
injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by
constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Believe in the
justice of God and the doctrine of Karma. Let Him judge the act of the
one who insulted you. Life is too short to waste in such trifles.
Forgive, Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and
forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition.
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody
without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in
power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your
achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to
kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is
not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely and
leave the rest to God.
4. Do Not Be Jealous.
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind.
You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but
sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business
several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor
whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like
these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember
everybody's life is shaped by his or her previous Karma, which has now
become his destiny. If you are destined to be rich, nothing in the
world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you
either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune.
Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace
of mind.
5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are
you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As
you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you,
will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious .
6 . Endure What Cannot Be Cured.
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every
day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and
accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or
change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn
to endure them cheerfully thinking, "God wills it so, so be it." God's
plan is beyond our comprehension. Believe in it and you will gain in
terms of patience, inner strength and will power.
7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take
more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is
done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional
loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by
expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements
and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will
reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. Uncluttered
mind will produce greater peace of mind.
8. Meditate Regularly.
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is
the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If
you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend
to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours.
Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would
benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily mediation. You may
think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary,
this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce
better results in less time.
9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the
vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something
worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your
interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind.
Your hobby, like social work or temple work, may not always earn you
more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement.
Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy
reading or mental chanting of God's name.
10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret.
Do not waste time in protracted wondering "Should I or shouldn't I?"
Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental
debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate
all future happenings. Always remember, God has His own plan, too for
you. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does
not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your
mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will
lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the
past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only
that way. Take it as the Will of God. You do not have the power to
alter the course of God's Will. Why cry over spilt milk?
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Wife Missing
A man calls into the police station and says, "My wife is missing."
The officer asks, "How long has she been gone?"
"A month."
"Why did you wait so long to report it?"
"Well, until yesterday I thought it was just a dream, then I realized I didn't have any clean clothes to wear."
The officer asks, "How long has she been gone?"
"A month."
"Why did you wait so long to report it?"
"Well, until yesterday I thought it was just a dream, then I realized I didn't have any clean clothes to wear."
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