This is really a hilarious one ....

During the Cold War, if USA launched a nuke-loaded missile,

Soviet satellites would inform the Soviet army in 3 seconds and in less than 5 seconds

Sovietcounter-missiles would be on their way.

This was their scenario.................

But if there is a nuclear war between India and Pakistan.

The Pakistan army decides to launch a nuke-missile towards India.

They don't need any permission from their government,

and

promptly order the countdowns.Indian technology is highly advanced.In less than 8 seconds, Indian army detects the Pak Countdown and

decides

to

launch a missile in retribution.

But they need permission from the Government of India.

They submit their request to the Indian President. The President

forwards it to the Cabinet.The Prime Minister calls an emergency Lok Sabha session. The LS meets, but

dueto several walkouts and severe protests by the opposition, it gets

adjourned

and

adjourned

indefinitely.

The President asks for a quick decision.

In the mean time,

the Pak missile failed to take off due to technical failure. Their

attempts for

a relaunch are still on.

Just then the Indian ruling party is reduced to a minority because a

party

thatwas giving outside support withdraws it.

The President asks the PM to prove his majority within a week.

As the ruling party fails to win the confidence vote,

a

caretaker government is installed.

The caretaker PM decides to permit the armed forces to launch a nuclear

missile.

But the Election Commission says that a caretaker government can not

take

such a decision because elections are at hand.

A Public Interest Litigation

is filed

in the Supreme Court alleging misuse of power by the Election Commission.

The Supreme Court comes to the rescue of the PM,

and says

the acting PM is authorized to take this decision in view of the

emergency

facing the nation.

Just then one of the Pak missiles successfully took off, but it fell 367 miles

away from the target, on its own government building at 11.00AM.

Fortunately

there were no casualties as no employee had reached the office thatearly.

In

any case, the nuclear core of the missile had detached somewhere in

flight.

The Pakistan army is now trying to get better technologies from China

and

USA.

The Indian Government, taking no chances, decides to launch a nuclear

missile

of its own, after convening an all-party meeting.

This time all the parties agree.

Its three months since the army had sought permission. But as

preparations

begin, "pro-humanity", "anti-nuclear" activists come out against the

Government's decision.

Human chains are formed and Rasta rokos organised.

In

California and Washington endless e-mails are sent to Indians condemning

the

government and mentioning

"Please forward it to as many Indians aspossible".

On the Pakistan side, the missiles kept malfunctioning. Some missiles

deviate

from target due to technical failures or high-speed wind blowing over

Rajasthan.

Many of them land in the Indian Ocean killing some fishes.

A missile (smuggled from USA) is pressed into service.Since the Pakistan army

is unable to understand its software, it hits its original destination: Russia.

Russia successfully intercepts the missile

and in retaliation launches a nuclear missile towards Islamabad.

The missile hits the target and creates havoc.

Pakistan cries for help.

India expresses deep regrets for what has happened

and

sends in a million dollars worth of Parle-G biscuits.

Thus India never gets to launch the missile.

Pakistan never gets it right.

AndJ J J we live happily ever after J J J
Jai * Hind